conchitawurst:

neptunain:

we need better sex ed because I know a girl who thought that the female orgasm always involved squirting so she fakes by peeing on guys and this needs to stop

Let her continue

neoputa:

i have unlimited texting and i only text 3 people ever i think my phone company looks at my bill and just laughs

Kid: Yeah give me a pack of Marlboro Reds.
Cashier: Are you 18?
Kid: It's okay, they're a metaphor.

my life is one big “wow ok”

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